Do you ever have days where you feel like you’re about to drown? You’re just treading water, doing everything you can to keep that next wave from pulling you down? Ever have whole weeks like that? Months?
I do. I’m there right now. Just trying to keep my head above water; trying to keep myself from going under. Just keep swimming, swimming, swimming… 🙂
There’s only so much you can do on days when your biggest accomplishment was making it through the day without falling apart. When it takes everything you have to get out of bed in the morning. To get dressed. To work. To talk to friends. To write. To keep up the appearance that everything is fine. To keep everyone from noticing that you’re slipping down that dark hole again.
Luckily, there’s light at the other end of that hole. It’s not always easy to see, but every once and while, I get a glimpse of life on the other side. Where it doesn’t hurt. Where there is laughter and sunshine and happiness.
It’s fleeting; only there for a few minutes or a few hours. Then the hole begins to close, the water begins to creep back up over my head. And I’m back down in the dark. Wondering when I’ll see the light again.