I’m sure you noticed that pretty much all year I’ve struggled to post something once a week, hell even once a month. I talked a little about it here but when I wrote that I honestly thought I would be back in the blogging saddle by summer at the latest. I thought that the personal problems would have gone away and life would be back to normal.
Unfortunately that’s not the case. Those problems that I can’t talk about online are still a very real thing and because of something that happened well over 6 months ago, but still related to that issue, the fear of getting in trouble because of this blog causes my heart to pound extra hard and that anxious feeling that makes my chest tighten to come back.
But as much as I would like to blame all my issues and unhappiness and general dissatisfaction with life on these problems, I know that’s not the case. I’ve fallen out of love with blogging. With social media to a certain extent. I tweet less. I used to check Twitter constantly throughout the day, and now I find myself skimming the first 15 or so tweets and moving on. Facebook, never my favorite social network, holds little appeal to me anymore. I check it every few days and usually get irritated over another useless prayer request or someone’s oddly staged engagement photos. The only site I consistently check and enjoy is Pinterest. Because, let’s face it, Pinterest is the greatest thing since sliced bread.
I really have no idea what my problem is. I am busier at work which means I have less time to plan posts and am usually too tired to write when I get home. I spend all day at work on the computer and the idea of spending a few more hours writing and editing pictures when I get home is exhausting.
But I’m not finding the time and finding excuses not to blog because I simply don’t want to. For no real reason other than I don’t think I have much to say. I used to think in tweets (seriously. don’t judge.) and was constantly writing blog posts in my head. I don’t do that anymore. Sometimes I see or do something and think “oh, I should blog about that”, but I think, “eh, I’d rather do something else”. What that something else is, I really don’t know. (What DO I do with all my time? Seriously, I have no idea.)
Ironically, this has turned into be a longish blog post; I really didn’t think I had much to say. But what the point of all of this rambling is, blogging no longer holds the appeal that it once did. There are a few things I could maybe point to as reasons, but, really, they’re just excuses. I’ve fallen out of love with blogging; there’s not much more to say about that.
(Except that I just wrote this in record time and already have another post ready to go for later in the week, so maybe I’m not as over it as I thought I was? I’m just a great big ball of confusion, aren’t I? 🙂 )This has nothing to do with anything, other than it’s completely random, just like me. Also, I think it’s hilarious.