Practically Perfect In Every Way…Or Not
For some reason some people are under the impression that I’m a bit like Mary Poppins, practically perfect in every way. And I can sort of see why.
You come here every day and read about my menu planning, my cooking prowess, how I’m such a great librarian, own a house, and have such an amazing social life that I actually complain about being too busy.
Yeah, I could see where you might hate me. If I was really like that, I would hate me too.
So I’m here to correct all those misunderstandings and clear the air. I am not perfect. Not in any way, shape, form, or fashion. Nor will I ever be.
Attempting to be perfect was something I worked incredibly hard at growing up. I would look around school or dance class and see these girls who looked as if everything they did was effortless; that being so together and so good at everything came naturally. They seemed like they had it all right, all together, and were just so perfect. I tried and I tried to be like that and failed every time.
But then I learned that I don’t have to be perfect. And I especially don’t have to be perfect at things I’m not good at. Which is probably why I (and this blog) sometimes give off the impression that I am perfect. I only write about things that I do well; I only post recipes that are successful (or that at least turned out successful even though I messed up the recipe); I generally only share the happy parts of my life. I have a very bad habit of only talking about the good and the things that go right.
I used to be much more forward about the crappy parts of life, admitting to things like being bullied as a teen, lacking in motivation, or struggling with depression, but, after taking a quick pass through my more recent blog posts, I noticed that I’ve stopped doing that. Not for any particular reason, but it’s probably not a good thing as it has led to several emails, tweets, and comments as to how I manage to do it all. How do I keep myself together, run a blog, own a home, work full time, and still have a great social life?
The answer is I don’t.
At any given time, my house is a complete disaster from all the cat litter Caty tracks around and from the fact that I haven’t done laundry in two weeks. I haven’t, despite my very best intentions, worked out in almost two weeks but I have baked several wonderful treats that I have no intentions of sharing. I often ignore phone calls when I don’t feel like talking. I abandon my meal plan (and my budget) at the slightest sign of a better opportunity such as grocery store sushi or an entire pint of Turtle Tracks ice cream. I shut out everything and everyone for days at a time so I can do nothing but lay around, read, and watch way too much TV. I oversleep every day and am almost always late for work. I have OCD to the point that it occasionally interferes with everyday life. I gossip and talk too much. I complain, often to the point of ridiculous. I procrastinate more than you could ever imagine.
I don’t do it all. I can’t do it all. I never will. And I will never be perfect, not in a million years. Neither are you. And that’s okay.
Do you struggle with perfection or feeling unequal to some of the bloggers you read?