It’s been a VERY long time since I’ve written about my love life, mainly because there was really nothing to say and I’m sure none of you want read the miserable whinings of a twenty-something single. Well, now there is something to say. So let me tell you the story.
About 5 months ago I took myself on a date to the movies to see What To Expect When You’re Expecting. I couldn’t get anyone to go with me, and since I’m not totally opposed to sitting alone in a movie theater with a giant bag of popcorn, I paid $8.25* to see it in the theater rather than wait for it to come to the RedBox.
After sympathizing a little too much with Elizabeth Banks and crying a little harder than I really should have when J. Lo. go her baby, I had a minor epiphany. Or a breakdown. Your choice; we’re really talking about the same thing here. As strong as I am and as capable as I am to live alone and raise a child as a single parent, I don’t WANT to. I want someone to come home to, to share all life’s little ups and downs with, someone to raise a family with, to grow old with. Something finally clicked on in my brain and so I did the only thing I hadn’t done already.
I signed up for online dating.
I had resisted for a while. My excuses included not wanting to pay for it, the small chance of finding someone halfway normal in a city like this, the sheer desperation it seemed to imply – you get the picture. But I said to hell with it; there are several reliable free sites, I’m not exactly normal either so I really can’t be too picky, and I actually was pretty desperate.
I picked a free site (my logic being that twenty-something guys wouldn’t want to pay for something they were skeptical about), did all the registration stuff, answered the hundreds of questions (seriously, hundreds), and was immediately bombarded with messages. No joke; I got like 50 that first week. What a nice way to stroke my ego. 🙂 I talked to a few guys, tried out the IM feature and the app, and continued to receive, weed through, and respond to messages.
I don’t remember when it was, but somewhere in the first couple of days I got a message that said simple “would you be willing to date someone with kids?”. I had already marked that I was okay with that on my profile so I responded back with an affirmative and we began to exchange really lengthy messages. I remember sitting on the couch waiting for a friend to pick me up so we could go somewhere, responding to his message, and thinking, “I kind of like this guy. He seems cool”. Within a day I worked up the courage to give him my phone number and we started texting. I was out of town that weekend so we arranged a date that next Monday at a local Indian restaurant.
We’ve been together ever since. 🙂
In an effort to maintain some kind of anonymity, I’m going to call him The Carpenter since that’s what he does for a living. Right now he works for a commercial cabinetry company but he also does residential work on the side. We have big plans (and by we I mean me) to put in some built-ins in my living room. He’s very handy and he’s willing, so I’m obviously going to take full advantage of that. lol
Some details: he’s divorced, a little more than a year older than me, has two kids (girl and boy, 6 and 3), and has done two non-consectutive semesters of college. He has a dog, loves my cooking, gets along with Caty, and thinks I’m pretty. 😉
I’m not going to lie and say this has been so easy and so perfect. It hasn’t. It’s been hard as hell. He works ridiculously long hours and has his kids every weekend. I haven’t met the kids yet (he has a 6 month rule that I fully support) so our time together is pretty limited. But so far, it’s been completely worth it. The Carpenter makes me happier than I’ve ever been with a guy so we’re making it work.
Which means this story is to be continued…
*Just a side note: when did it get so expensive to go to the movies? $8.25 is the matinee price. Good gravy movie going is an expensive hobby.